My brother Tony

is an AWESOME wrestler. I went to a tournament today and he pinned two sizable individuals. I think he might be the incredible hulk.

While we're on that topic, my brother Louis and I had an excellent conversation about relationships last night. We reached the conclusion that, even though you can break up and push someone out of your consciousness at the drop of a hat, the feelings only really get shoved to the back of your head where you don't actually have to feel them as you go about your business. It's like they still exist on their own, packaged up in a little box that you have to empty slowly, bit by bit, as it comes up. You can think about them objectively and regard them and it feels like you'll have to deal with them at some point, but maybe you won't ever really have to ever. Maybe they're just there to learn from. Maybe.

Anyway, to hear him talking about his ex-girlfriend gave me a bit of a picture of what I'm in for. But I knew that anyway, I guess. It's just strange to feel happy about things instead of feeling happy in spite of things, which is how I hoped to feel at best.

So thank goodness for mental defenses, and perspective (which is a running theme lately).

meryl